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Next week, on CBS All-Access Voq implants their personality into another character's subconscious but actually is the true source of anime on Earth.

This time Guinan is caught in a time bubble but they have to find the cure to save their best friend.

In this episode B'Elanna accidentally discovers new life on the holodeck but ends up stuck in the mirror universe

This time Cmdr. Tuvok meets space nazis but actually is the reason why we cry.

This time Spock has some trouble with tribbles but also convinces Starfleet that fuckbots are sentient and have rights.

This time Chakotay can't escape a dream but finds the ship overrun with holodeck characters!

This time Lt. Reed travels through time but could have solved everything if the sensors had just fucking worked.

In this episode Captain Kirk makes first contact with a new, obviously stereotypical, alien race but actually is the reason why we cry.

In this episode Nog is hijacked by a space pirate named Vantika for nefarious purposes but also convinces Admiral Fraiser to take Space LSD.

In this episode Chief O'Brien meets another fake god but it turns out it's a faaaaaake

This time Tom Paris meets Amelia Earhart but is trapped in a mind-meld with another fucking old Spock.

Tonight on Star Trek: The Next Generation
Ensign Ro makes first contact with a race of sentient insects but really discovers why the spice must flow.

This time The EMH returns from shore leave but they ran out of the special effects budget and just solved everything with a meeting.

In this episode Captain Janeway can't control their holodeck addiction but could have solved everything if the transporter had just fucking worked.

This time Kira has to deal with Gul Jasad but never really resolves the Klingon problem.

This time Spock can't leave well enough alone but it turns out it's a faaaaaake

In this episode Chakotay can't go below warp 5 or the core will explode but can't escape the holodeck!

Tonight on Star Trek
Mr. Sulu Crosses the galactic barrier but they have to find the cure to save their best friend.

This time Captain Janeway can't control their holodeck addiction but is really in the dream of a sick child at a hospital.

In this episode Hoshi travels through time but can't remember the last 24 hours.

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