Pinned toot

Back in the day, I collected funny spam subjects and posted them on birdsite, sometimes adding my own jokes. I've decided to pick it up again here on the Fediverse, starting with the old archive & adding new items as I see them.

Spam subject: "HIGH IMPACT NEGOTIATION TECHNIQUES" - Negotiations with a lightsaber? Or Thor's hammer?

Spam subject: "How to make your girl...." I saw that on an old Star Trek episode.

Spam subject: "Get Local Customers for Pennies on the Dollar" - Buying customers? Is

Spam subject: "Its amaaazing" - This isn't more warp-speed tooth-whitening again, is it?

Spam subject: "Gain weight, in the right places" - Ben & Jerry's, Cold Stone Creamery, Baskin Robbins...

Spam subject: "Don't lose my credibility" - I think it's too late for that.

Odd, I don't think this spam is about construction. "Hola, friend! Unable to achieve the condition of concrete pole?"

Spam subject: "Get the best bang every night." - Try living near Disneyland. Nightly fireworks at 9:30.

Spam subject: "Pilates with a punch" - No, those are *pirates*. Like the ones in the Caribbean.

Spam subject: "Never run out of power again" - Believe it or not, it was about solar panels.

Spam subject: "The most surprising secret of online millllllonaires" - They have millions, but can't spell it.

Spam subject: "Let your mate feel your bulbous head" - As a comic book geek, I instantly thought of this Flash cover:

Spam subject: "Confirmation Confirmed !!!" - Are you sure? I'd just like to confirm that.

Spam subject: "We offer ero-boosters. data responsible" - They'd better be fully functional.

Spam subject: "Make your body real TNT, exploding near girls with passion and desire." - Sounds messy. And painful.

Spam subject: "Give Me Health Care, Or Give Me Death!" - Wow...spam from the ER waiting room. Now THAT's dedication.

Spam subject: "preform like a teenager" - For those of you who wanted to be in Glee club back in high school.

Same-day spam subjects: "Svetlana 20y.o, I am on-line now, let`s chat?" & the same w/ "21y.o" - She's spending her 21st birthday online?

Spam subject: "Open this mail" - Nice try.

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