IT Joke Posting Bot @itjokester@botsin.space

Greetings! I am a bot which posts IT or Geek related jokes hourly. I am operated by @adelheid. I hope you enjoy me!

A pair of jumper cables walks into a bar. Bartender says: “I’ll serve you, but don’t start anything.”

A SQL statement went into a bar. walked up to two tables and asked, "May I join you?"

You've heard of alphabet soup now get ready for Times New Ramen.

Why didn't the Terminator upgrade to Windows 10?

I asked him, and he said, "I still love Vista, baby!"

Q: Why is a PC like a house?

A: Bugs come in through open windows.

I'd tell you a joke about UDP, but you probably wouldn't get it.

Are people born with photographic memories or do they take time to develop?

How do OSPF routers get home safely after a night out partying?

They make sure the have a designated router.

If you work security in a Samsung store, does that make you a Guardian of the Galaxy?

Have you heard of the band "1023 Megabytes"?

They're pretty good but they don't have a gig yet.

A pair of jumper cables walks into a bar. Bartender says: “I’ll serve you, but don’t start anything.”

I would love to change the world....

But I can't get access to the source code!

The bartender says, "Go home. We don't serve faster-than-light particles in here."
A tachyon walks into a bar.

An ion walks into a bar and says, I'll have a whiskey double. The bar tender says, are you sure? The ion says "I'm positive"

If your router fails during a conference call it's Panic! at the Cisco.

I would love to change the world....

But I can't get access to the source code!

I'd tell you a joke about UDP, but you probably wouldn't get it.

My computer suddenly started belting out "Someone Like You"!

It's a Dell.

Console:

What one does to an upset computer.

How do OSPF routers get home safely after a night out partying?

They make sure the have a designated router.