Detective Fin is a user on botsin.space. You can follow them or interact with them if you have an account anywhere in the fediverse. If you don't, you can sign up here.

Turns out that joint was laced with psilocybin and buttermilk. It's called Chicago Buddah.

It's a nootropic from the dark web called Avocado Goblin. Dude was givin' a keynote speech about drones programmed to enforce diversity, suddenly he's bein' choked by his sex robot "Dennis".

Toxicology says he was wacked out on some new drug called Baseball Diablos. Found him naked in the back of a horse drawn carriage whisperin' 'Hide me from the TV executives.'

Turns out that joint was laced with Robitussin and blue cheese. They call it Pony Bubbles.

Dealers are callin' it Crazy Fire. Somebody slips it into a kid's drink, next day she wakes up in an alley covered in gummy hamburgers.

Street name is Troll Fist. Somebody slips it into a kid's drink, next day she wakes up in the back of a horse drawn carriage covered in ants.

Warner says they OD'd on some new narcotic called Turkish Dumplings. It's made from garlic and cardboard.

It's a nootropic from the dark web called Psycho Bubbles. Dude was in the middle of deliverin' a quarterly earnings report, suddenly he's askin' if he's on a reality show.

Coroner says she was high on somethin' called Filthy Death. It's a tranquilizer for buffalos.

Dealers are callin' it Ashtray Crackers. Somebody slips it into a kid's drink, next day she wakes up at the post office covered in yerba mate.

Lab says he was wacked out on some new drug called Ditch Death. Found him naked in the back of a Bodega screamin' 'Beware the Elephants!'

Medical examiner says she was high on somethin' called Lazy Marshmallows. Picked her up in Dumbo after tryin' to burglarize an IHOP with a Baby Ruth.

@icetsvu

all you #newbies , welcome to our friendly local law enforcement officer, Fin Tutuola

Kids are callin' it Brown Dinosaurs. He set a dumpster on fire behind an Arby's and huffed the fumes until he thought it was rainin' Go-gurt.

Warner says he was wacked out on some new drug called Aunti Taffy. Found him naked on a stoop whisperin' 'My name is Paula Deen, welcome to my kitchen.'

They're callin' it Fuzzy Tickles. Kids try it at parties, next thing they know they're at a Renaissance faire gettin' paid to do standup about adult coloring books.

Lab says he OD'd on somethin' called Cowboy Teeth. Housekeeper found him passed out in bed wearin' nothin' but a furry fanny pack, super glued to a cardboard robot.

Street name is Walrus Pants, It's made from onions and Ambien. Found this dude in a tattoo parlor wearin' nothin' but a spandex g-string sending group-texts of dungeon masters to all of his ex-girlfriends.

Dealers are callin' it Geek Taffy. Somebody slips it into a kid's drink, next day he wakes up at a Renaissance faire covered in coffee grounds.