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excuse #37:

heavy gravity fluctuation, move computer to floor rapidly

excuse #196:

Me no internet, only janitor, me just wax floors.

excuse #371:

Incorrectly configured static routes on the corerouters.

excuse #237:

Plate voltage too low on demodulator tube

excuse #146:

Communications satellite used by the military for star wars.

excuse #26:

first Saturday after first full moon in Winter

excuse #198:

Post-it Note Sludge leaked into the monitor.

excuse #231:

We had to turn off that service to comply with the CDA Bill.

excuse #199:

the curls in your keyboard cord are losing electricity.

excuse #320:

You've been infected by the Telescoping Hubble virus.

excuse #24:

network packets travelling uphill (use a carrier pigeon)

excuse #110:

The rolling stones concert down the road caused a brown out

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