excuse #188:

..disk or the processor is on fire.

excuse #259:

Someone's tie is caught in the printer, and if anything else gets printed, he'll be in it too.

excuse #171:

NOTICE: alloc: /dev/null: filesystem full

excuse #397:

T-1's congested due to porn traffic to the news server.

excuse #256:

You need to install an RTFM interface.

excuse #251:

Processes running slowly due to weak power supply

excuse #452:

Somebody ran the operating system through a spelling checker.

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