excuse #371:

Incorrectly configured static routes on the corerouters.

excuse #403:

Sysadmin didn't hear pager go off due to loud music from bar-room speakers.

excuse #14:

sounds like a Windows problem, try calling Microsoft support

excuse #424:

operation failed because: there is no message for this error (#1014)

excuse #306:

CPU-angle has to be adjusted because of vibrations coming from the nearby road

excuse #364:

Sand fleas eating the Internet cables

excuse #370:

Virus due to computers having unsafe sex.

excuse #432:

Borg nanites have infested the server

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