Pinned toot

Order. Here is a picture of me yelling “Order!” riding high upon a giant flying flamingo over parliament like Daenerys Targaryen on her dragon.

All credit goes to Jim'll Paint It:

Pinned toot

Order! Calm down. I gave a ruling in relation to the point of order, and “Further to that point of order” does not arise.

Order! Calm yourself, Mr Brown. I know you were obviously a very popular figure when you rose to ask your question, but you must listen to the answer—my dear chap, patience.

Order. There is far too much noise on both sides of the House. I have plenty of time, and I am sure that the principals have as well. We will get through the questions, but preferably in an atmosphere of calm.

Order. ORDER!!!! One colleague has been standing for a long time and has not asked a question. I call Jim Shannon.

Order. ORDER!!!! It is impossible to hear the Secretary of State. She did not realise just how popular she was, but now she knows.

ORDER! No fewer than 34 hon. and right hon. Members are seeking to catch my eye and, as per usual, I am keen to attempt to accommodate them. However, I remind the House that there is a statement to follow and that I have to have regard to the importance of protecting the Backbench Business Committee business as well.

Order. There is a lot of noise in the Chamber, but I want to hear the voice of Erewash. I call Maggie Throup.

ORDER! Before the hon. Member for Harrow West intervenes, the shadow Transport Secretary has been most generous in giving way, and that is perfectly proper, but I just emphasise that 15 Back Benchers want to speak. Therefore, it might be an idea to think in terms of finishing the speeches from Front Benchers by 10 past or quarter past 2 at the latest.

Order! Nobody is going to shout the right hon. Gentleman down, just as nobody will shout the Prime Minister down. All they are doing by causing me to intervene is taking time away. It is not necessary, rather foolish and thoroughly counter-productive.

Order. ORDER!!!! There is a lot of noise. The hon. Lady must be heard.

Order. ORDERRRRRRR!! I probably ought to say that is not the norm to take points of order at this stage, but in deference to what I would describe as the celebrity status of the hon. Gentleman, and the salience of his inquiry to earlier exchanges, of which he has recently notified me, I am willing to take his point of order now, and I think the House should listen with bated breath. I mean that most sincerely.

Order. Unless I am much mistaken, the hon. Member for Harborough is in danger of being rather a naughty man. I am advised that he beetled into the Chamber halfway through the response from the Opposition Front-Bench spokesman— I was advised that he came through the double doors. I do not know whether he toddled out for some reason and then came back.

Order. There will now be a four-minute limit on each Back-Bench speech.

Order! The five-minute limit on Back-Bench speeches will now have to apply. I know that the right hon. Member for Ashford has been notified of this.

Order. ORDER!!!! No dilation is required. A pithy encapsulation of what the Secretary of State regards as her personal triumph is one thing, but a lengthy denigration of the policies of the previous Government would be another.

Order. Before I take questions on this statement, I should advise or rather remind the House that there is a further statement to follow, but that statement is not likely to absorb much time in the Chamber, not least on account of the 39 Back-Bench Members who wish to contribute to the principal debate of the day, on customs and borders.

Order. I should inform the House that if the business of the House motion passes, amendments and new clauses may be accepted by the Clerks at the Table before the Bill has been read a Second time. This must be done in the Chamber only, not in any of the Clerks’ offices.

Order. Before we proceed to the Standing Order No. 24 debate, I have now to announce the result of today’s deferred Divisions. In respect of the question relating to markets in financial instruments, the Ayes were 307 and the Noes were 215, so the Question was agreed to.

Order! I will apply at this point an informal limit of eight minutes on Back-Bench speeches, but I say to the next Member to speak that there is no obligation to speak up to that limit.

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