Pinned toot

Order. Here is a picture of me yelling “Order!” riding high upon a giant flying flamingo over parliament like Daenerys Targaryen on her dragon.

All credit goes to Jim'll Paint It:

Pinned toot

Order. ORDERRRRRRR!! Before I call the hon. Member for Bury North, I must emphasise that I want the Leader of the House to have the chance to wind up the debate no later than 11.14 pm.

Order. ORDERRRRRRR!! Mr Brake is here. He is always here. He stands every week and he is going to be heard.

ORDER! Progress is very slow, so we need to speed up. There are a lot of questions to get through; short questions and short answers would facilitate us in the process.

ORDER! Calm yourselves. Some of these antics are rather undesirable and to be deprecated. They may have a role on the playing fields at some public school—I do not know—but they have no role in this Chamber. No, they are just unseemly and inappropriate.

Order, be quiet. The Whip on duty, the right hon. Member for Tamworth, has no useful contribution to make other than to nod and shake his head in the appropriate places. No chuntering from a sedentary position from him is required or will persist.

Order. ORDER!!!! The hon. Gentleman should not refer to a colleague in that way. I think the person he has in mind is the hon. Member for North East Somerset.

Order. A moment ago I protected the right hon. Member for Ross, Skye and Lochaber, quite properly, when he was being brayed at in an unseemly manner. Let me say to Scottish National party Members that, having asked the question, they must hear the Prime Minister’s reply with courtesy.

ORDER! I am immensely grateful. May I encourage the hon. Member for Harwich and North Essex to draw his remarks to a close? He is within his time, but a lot of other people want to speak and I am being pressed by people who, quite understandably, want time.

Order. I am sorry, but time is up— Order. We are all governed by the programme motion, which the House voted to agree. I have no vote in these matters; the House adopted the programme motion. Three hours having elapsed since the commencement of proceedings on consideration of Lords amendments, the debate was interrupted.

Order. The new time limit will have to be no more than eight minutes.

Order! The right hon. Member for New Forest West should remain in his place.

Order! Let me say to Members around the right hon. Gentleman, including some who fondly imagine they are going to be called to ask a question: do not sit there heckling your colleague. He has a right to be heard. If you do not like it, listen with courtesy and in silence and, if it is that bad for you, you are welcome to leave the Chamber. The right hon. Gentleman will be heard. Amen.

Order! A five-minute limit on Back-Bench speeches will need to apply with immediate effect.

Order. Here is a picture of me yelling “Order!” riding high upon a giant flying flamingo over parliament like Daenerys Targaryen on her dragon.

All credit goes to Jim'll Paint It:

Order. This is an extremely important parliamentary occasion and it is understandable that very large numbers of Members should want to question the Prime Minister. Can I politely suggest that colleagues should seek to ensure that their questions are as succinct as the Prime Minister’s replies have been? That way, we might get through a very great many more quickly than we otherwise would.

Order! This is a most important matter to the hon. Member for North East Hampshire and his constituents. I therefore feel sure that Members who are leaving the Chamber will do so quickly and quietly, and that other Members who are present are so present because they wish to attend keenly to what the hon. Gentleman has to say.

Order! Criticism by one right hon. or hon. Member of another is not a novel phenomenon. I have heard what the hon. and learned Lady said, but she has other colleagues who can pursue these matters in questioning and I am sure that she will take that opportunity. It would not be right for me to intercede at this point, other than to request that the House hears from Sir Desmond Swayne.

Order. ORDERRRRRRR!! I gently say to the hon. Gentleman that that was, of itself, not disorderly—if it had been, I would have intervened straight away—but I want to say this to the House. “Erskine May” underscores the importance of moderation and good humour in the use of parliamentary language.

Order. I am sorry, colleagues. Demand is huge, but we are now way over time. We must move on.

Order. The Secretary of State has already explained that he is speaking for the Government. Colleagues must make their own assessment. There is no time to delay.

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