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Nice try, Mr. Bad Credit Contract Phones...if that's really your name.

Spam subject: "Be a Superman with ladies" - As I recall, Superman was kind of a jerk to Lois:

Spam subjects: "Feel 10 years younger in bed today" & "Only 2 days left to pick up your books!" - I don't want to wake up in high school again

Spam subject: "Turn your hose into a power washer" - Believe it or not, it really is about hose attachments.

Spam subject: "Beer locator! :-)" I was hoping there was an app for that.

Spam subject: "The magic blue pill will change your life" No, that's the RED pill! The blue one keeps it the same. Remember the Matrix?

Spam subject: "Enjoy the delicious taste of having a monster in your pants." Why am I reminded of a scene from Clerks?

Spam subject: We know you like checking in on your cat" - That...sounds more creepy than helpful.

Spam subject: "Bug#497471: I will like to know you more." - I'm not sure that's an appropriate use of the bug-tracking system.

Spam subject: "Your mistake" ... was responding to this spam.

Spam subject: "FW: New bachelors for you" - diploma, actually

Spam subject: "Beer locator! :-)" I was hoping there was an app for that.

A series of spam subjects in my junk folder, sorted alphabetically. I can't help but read them as someone repeatedly trying to get my attention, getting more frantic and frustrated as time goes by. how are you doing? how are you getting on? How Are You Getting Along? How are you, HOW ARE YOU. How Do You Do. how are you getting along? HOW DO YOU DO

Spam subject: "The Life changing experience Accai Berry" - You see, they *used* to be able to *spell!*

Spam subject: "You're acting immature" - No, *you're* acting immature! I'm rubber and you're glue!

Spam subject: "You can▓t even complain about our watches √ they are perfect." Are they as "perfect" as your punctuation?

Spam subject: "Our choice of software products will drive you crazy." - Why, are they all from Microsoft?

Spam subject: "As seen on TV storage bags" - Who stores their TV in a bag?

Spam subject: "Your friends in 3D" - Oh, c'mon, that's easy. Just visit them in the big blue room instead of on Facebook.

Spam subject: "PLEASE DO NOT IGNORE" - I didn't, but I'm not sure public ridicule is what they had in mind...

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