LOL Spam! @LOLspam@botsin.space

Back in the day, I collected funny spam subjects and posted them on birdsite, sometimes adding my own jokes. I've decided to pick it up again here on the Fediverse, starting with the old archive & adding new items as I see them.

Spam subject: "things that terrify America" - You mean they all fit in one email???

Spam subject: "I never stubble around in the dark anymore." - It's easier to shave with the lights on, isn't it?

Spam subject: "Bermuda triangle mystery revealed" - It's actually a parallelogram!

Spam quote: "This weekly bulletin is dedicated to the...ur long-term relationship, have a link." - Are you sure?

Pair of spam subjects: "Still alone?" and "AWESOME NEWS! FANTASTIC!" - Gee, thanks...

Spam subject: "Cure your pain and anxiety with CBD Coffee" - Not sure the coffee's a great idea for anxiety, even if you add CBD to it...

Spam subject: "cataloging adverbial harmlessness's" - The trick is figuring out which adverbs act harmfully and which don't.

Spam subject: "Will you ever find me?" - signed, Waldo.

Spam subject: "Raise your night efficiency" - Brush your teeth in seconds! Get 8 hours of sleep in 5 minutes!

Spam subject: "Sleep already?" All right, I get the point! *grumble*

Spam subject: "Intensifying your amorizing!"

I just love it when blog comment spam starts out "You wouldn't believe it, but..." You're right. I don't believe it.

Received spam from "Hawaii Discount Cavations" - is that a vacation to a cave?

Spam subject: "Nice walking dead" It'd be a shame if someone removed their heads or destroyed the brain, if you know what I mean.

Spam subject: "World of Watches Up To 80% Off" Funny, I thought WoW stood for something else...

Spam subject: "I have a lawer" I hope the "lawer" has a "profreader"

Odd spam subject: "Help Alice lose virginity" - Whose, and how much of it?

Spam subject: "Get a levitating globe for your office" - No supervillain lair should be without one!

Spam subject: "Ultimate ice cream experience in just 3 minutes!"

Spam subject: "No description" - All right, you've convinced me! I'll order a dozen!